Why are you so awesome? Were you always awesome? David Copperfield me.

Aw, I'm awesome? =3
Thank you.
I'm pretty sure I haven't ALWAYS been awesome. I'm pretty sure I've been lame for the majority of my life. I don't know when that started to turn around. High school? But I didn't hit full blown awesome until college, most likely when I got to IUSB. =P
I think it takes time to build up awesome. Unless your parents passed along the awesome gene, in which case you're a lucky motherfucker. But I am proud of the level of awesome I have achieved so far. =]

"David Copperfield me" is what I don't understand.

Ask or tell me anything..

What I'm dealing with

I still think about you I still think about you I still think about you I still think about you I still think about you I still think about you

And it would be that way no matter which way I go.

I stay where I'm at and wonder 'what if' about the newness, the possibilities, the fun that could have been.
I go the other way and wonder 'what if' about how far we could have really gone, how deep those feelings could have continued to delve, how happy I could have been.

Nothing is forever. Sorry.
And since that is the case, technically nothing will ultimately 'work out.' One month, one year, one decade. I don't believe in forever, it's going to end sometime, therefore it won't 'work out.'
So that brings me to WHAT'S THE POINT? That's where I should choose the hole I've dug and just stay there without anyone. That's probably what I deserve but not what anybody will let me have.

Third parties call me names, those involved still think I'm a saint. w.t.f.

I HAVE TO DO THIS

I'm thinking about refraining from twitter (mostly) and just writing a bunch here.

BUT I NEVER HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY ONCE I'M FINALLY SITTING DOWN TO WRITE.

=]

You are my Gold, I am your Silver. Together, we can catch them all.

WOW: just read a quick blurb about an attack on a defenseless man at a bar. One guy hit him with a hammer and the other, wielding a SAMURAI SWORD, cut off one of his hands! Yes, that's nuts, but the unarmed man (no pun, srsly) DID NOT NOTICED and, still trying to ward off the attacker, then proceeded to punch the guy in the face WITH HIS BRAND NEW STUB ARM. Holy shit. The hand was later reattached, which is awesome. But HOT. DAMN. (cracked.com)

Haven't really done much of any homework throughout the week---first time I've never even cared to in... ever. I feel terrible. I can't concentrate. But I have to get my act together this weekend. I can't handle being a failure. Not now. Not ever.

TO DO:
catching up on homework
make appointments for counselling and wellness
see advisor about transfer credits and graduation
look into grad schools: b-town or film school

APARTMENT APPLICATION

clear up my mind, make a decision

work on getting off medication

LIVE

I don't care if I'm around or not, you're watching this

Original video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-agl0pOQfs

SNL spoof:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FGbdomlBnJM

You're welcome. =]

...

I'm going to start writing more once we finally get internet at the apartment (different from last apartment).

UPDATE: Got the internet today. And I really miss German exchange students.

How would you feel if you discovered that you were an Antichrist-like figure destined to bring about the end of the world?

...

Ask or tell me anything....